Well, in the immortal words of Billy Madison: "Back to school, back to school, to prove to Dad that I’m not a fool." Well yeah, sure we’ve been back for like 3 weeks, but since I got bumped from the "Strike Issue" I’m still allowed to complain about the past 3 weeks too. Plus, we’re only "back to school" until the faculty decides that they’re not making enough money and administration decides that we’re not paying enough. But maybe I’m being a bit too harsh, and that this is probably not a fair assessment of the whole situation. I’m sure there are several perfectly good reasons to take millions of dollars from students every year and use it to pay for trips and for security vans and for moving utility sheds around and then to decide not to ensure that the students have professors to teach their classes. It’s just that I can’t really think of these good reasons right off hand.
But then, who’s complaining? Christmas, (or Hanukkah) (or Kwanza) or whatever was great, Santa (or whoever you happen to believe comes down your chimney) came and most of us are almost completely recovered from New Year’s. Also, once again, exams are a distant nightmare.
In a way though, I think that I will miss exam time. It always seems to be a period when UPEI unites itself like a big family, to help each other get through what can be such a trying time. Students cram together in the library, hitting the books and helping each other, trying to ease each other’s pain. Even UPEI Administration chips in, performing seemingly unnecessary and noisy renovations in the library lobby during the peak of our academic studies, rendering one of the two exits inaccessible and making studying impossible. It’s amazing how the sound of jack-hammers jarring on concrete can ease the stress, especially after being awake studying and writing papers for 36 hours straight.
Some mornings, particularly those in which it is cold enough out to freeze human flesh solid in less than ten minutes, obviously any university that cared about the well-being of its students would have to common decency to forget about having classes for one day. Yeah. you’d think that wouldn’t you? But no, last week, on a day when a simple walk across the field from Blanchard to KCI would leave any normal person, by conservative estimates, well....DEAD, the University of Prince Edward Island was open for business. The same day that every other school on this island was closed. And why? God knows. High School kids don’t have to walk from building-to-building for class. Junior high students don’t have to walk miles to get to their busses in some random, far-off parking lot and elementary kids can always have indoor recess. But no. UPEI is a world apart. When everywhere else on PEI is -41 and it’s like minus a billion on campus, we still get to go to school, endanger our lives and wait for classes to be cancelled by some event that’s more significant. Like a totally legitimate strike.
So it sort of angers me when I’m trudging to class at 8:30 am and Paul Allen insists on saying "All classes are cancelled for students on PEI." You know, we’re students too Paul. So I figured I’d give him a call and point out the error of his ways. Our good friends at Magic 93. "Paul" I said " Maybe you should stop saying that there are no classes for students on P.E.I., because as far as I know, 2900 students still have classes at UPEI." Well, this pissed off Paul a good deal. He retorted, basically, that UPEI students don’t count, and that "university students should know when they have classes." Ohhhhh. I am SO sorry. I figured, you know, the station that insists on calling itself the Island News Leader might want to get a few stories straight once in awhile. But no. The home of ‘Storm Watch’ and their anchors would rather wallow in their ignorant bliss, make really stupid remarks and report things that isn’t really news. But I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. This is the same radio station that ignored the terrorist attacks on September 11th and kept on playing "Great Lite Rock Hits". Good plan guys! Keep ignoring the world and maybe they’ll start ignoring you too. And Paul, I’m sorry that I’m going to university and trying to improve myself, even it means that "I don’t count" in your little world. Get a life. And maybe a real job too.
2004 has been a harsh year on me so far. Just two weeks ago my heart was broken. Canada lost the World Juniors to the United States. Yeah, you heard me, to the United States. When the hell did the US start thinking they could play hockey? Actually I still don’t think they can. If it wasn’t for all the Brett Hull wannabes who cross the border to play for them, they’d still be where they belong. Dead last, tied with the Ukraine or something. But who knew that Marc-André Fleury could score too? Poor guy.
Now I know teams employing ‘the trap’ received a lot of criticism at the beginning of the current NHL season, but I can’t help but wish that Team Canada would’ve done just that and sat on their 2-goal lead going into the third. Ahwell. There’s always next year I guess. But hey, we’re still the World and Olympic Champions. Silver’s not THAT bad. I guess. We could challenge them to a game of curling.
And Saddam Hussein. Found living in a hole under a Styrofoam brick. This, folks, is when you know you’re done as a politician. You don’t have any more palaces, your army deserts you, most of the world and your own country hates you, you’re living in a hole and they don’t even give you a real damn brick to hide under.
But Bush is still advocating that Hussein should be granted a fair trial. Sure, I’m all for justice and the freedom of democracy, but does that make sense to anyone? Isn’t this the man they’ve been chasing for over a decade? The man that they were trying to find when they invaded Iraq? Twice? And now they want to give him a fair trial. What about all the people killed under the regime of his Ba’athists? What about the thousands that died under US bombs and trade embargoes that were aimed at toppling his empire? I know that justice is the prerogative of democracy, but why grant it to the man that denied it to so many others?
And finally, America’s sweetheart has gotten married. And divorced. All in like 10 minutes. Yes, Britney Spears tied the knot a few weekends back. For about fifteen minutes. You know, it really is hard for me to watch such a strong marriage based on the core values of drunkenness and stupidity fall apart like that.
And with that the holiday season is over for another year. The turkey leftovers have been eaten, all the annoying relatives have gone home, and the house on the corner of Kirkwood and University has finally taken down its seizure-inducing decorations. Yes, the "house that Christmas threw up on" is back to normal, and we’re back to the books for another semester on the coldest place on earth. Happy New Year.
Have a good one!
