I have no qualms about renewable energy programs on PEI. Hurricane Juan made me realize that I am a big fan of electricity, and the cheap stuff isn’t bad either. But what is it with Binn’s plans for it? Natural gas generating plants? Last time we checked, we don’t have any natural gas. A multi-million dollar pipeline? Cool. But why didn’t we sign on when it was a much more affordable prospect? And wind farms? Come on now. Everyone knows that if you’re looking for a place to harness wind energy on P.E.I., the windswept campus of UPEI is the place to do it, not Malpeque. (As a popular university joke once put it: Q: Why is it so windy in Charlottetown? A: Because UPEI blows.) Just chalk it up as another poorly planned provincial government endeavour.
Speaking of systems that don’t make any sense, I have a bit of trouble understanding this parking system here at UPEI. A few years back it was decided by administration that us students have way too much freedom just parking in any old parking lot on campus. It was decided we should pay $50 for the privilege of parking in parking lots that we basically pay for. But what would all this money for parking passes pay for? Because, you know, we could always use the extra fifty bucks for essentials, like for drinking or something, or perhaps for more trivial items such as, oh, I don’t know...books maybe? But, as it turns out, our money is going to pay for our wonderful security personnel to drive around in their cute little mini van and pass out parking tickets for violations. And why not eh? Us university students have tons of money. $50? That’s nothing on top of our $5000 tuition. Pocket change. We love the brisk walks from the annals of the earth behind C.C. or KCI to our classes in Duffy or Main when it’s -40 degrees. And towing our cars us for little or no reason is perfectly ok too. Why not sell passes to parking spaces that don’t exist? As long as we have the peace of mind in knowing that our hard-earned money is going somewhere important, namely, to protect our beloved security staff from the elements as they punish other students and to pay for their gas to make half a dozen trips to Tim Horton’s everyday. God forbid they crack down on real crime.
I was told last week by a professor that once upon a time that our great university had free parking. I didn’t believe that. Being a naive second year student, I didn’t experience the "crazy days" of the late nineties here on campus. The days of the Drink-the-Barn-Dry when crazy radical ideas like free parking were swirling around. Back in the day, I was told, we didn’t pay for the privilege of having a van on our ass all day trying to penalize us for parking wrong or telling us to "Move along." But those days are gone. Free and unrestricted parking? Nahhhh. That would never catch on.
I also love how all the computers work in the all of the computer labs here on campus. Oh damn. I must’ve been thinking of that other university again. The one that isn’t stuck somewhere in 1993.
Could I please have a show of hands of how many people would like to beat the snot out of whoever came up with those "I’m lovin’ it" MacDonald’s commercials? Seriously, what the hell does some old guy in leopard underpants and exploding amplifiers have to do with hamburgers and fries? Quite a lot, apparently. And Justin Timberlake. Has he finally sold his soul to the MacDonald’s empire? Whatever happened to N*Sync teaming up with Burger King? Damn you Justin. Damn you. You’ve ruined the integrity of the pop music world forever.
Has anyone else seen this MacQueen’s Bike Shop new fitness program entitled "Sweat Shop"? That doesn’t seem like a bit of insensitivity on their part does it? I guess it’s not like children in foreign countries are forced to produce some of their products. No wait...it is. Good call MacQueen’s.
Welcome to the PEI SWAT team! It’s about time we had a force to stand up to that fishing mob that is always trying to bring in their ‘crazy’ ideas to preserve fish stocks. Now I realize that the police were brought in to serve a court order. But 100 RCMP docked out in riot gear? With 9mm rifles? You gotta love PEI.
Sources inform me that Sarah Fraser has been cut from the cast of Canada Now and will be leaving her anchoring duties later on this month. You know, I hate to see her go, but I always had a hard time figuring out if she had any idea what she was talking about ever since they reported on the Cass Rhynes case: "he communicated with them over some sort of internet system called ‘MSN’." No more ignorance at the cost of journalistic integrity? It just breaks my heart.
Poor Mike Keenan, fired this week from the head coaching position for the Florida Panthers. Why the hell does south Florida have a hockey team anyway? Personally, I don’t really think Keenan was their problem anyway. Their problem is that their GM is a moron. As a side note, the Florida Panthers were shut out in their first game without Keenan. I say: good job getting to the source of your problem. Idiots. Farewell Mike. See you in Washington?
And finally, happy retirement to the big man in Ottawa, Jean Chretien. For the past ten years, the little guy from Shawinigan has warmed our hearts, made us laugh or maybe cry and emptied our pockets along the way. But, all in all, he didn’t do that bad of a job of running this great country of ours. And while Dubya was choking on pretzels south of the border, our good old Jean was choking his own protesters. Then there’s his wife, Aline, who, when an intruder broke into the Prime Ministerial fortress at 24 Sussex Drive, was poised with an inuit statue, ready to beat the shit out of whatever or whomever came barging through the door. Truly a first family that we can be proud of.
Well, I guess my time is up, as the library is performing its ultra-professional method of telling people that they are closing; by flicking on and off the lights. I better get out of here before Mr. Security gets here and tells me to move along.
Have a good one!
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